First of a Kind

Spotted: A Prepaid Berry User

Happy Monday everyone. Had 2 packets of really hot nasi lemak and I feel a little queasy now.

fuck up day

...and I just want to rant. note the lack of proper capitalisation fuck this shit. Also note the lack of a past tense in the title.

Started my day by getting myself in an accident.



Picked my brother up from tuition, was rather sleepy and ran into the rear left door of a poor guy's Avanza.

According to Toyota, the whole door needs to be replaced and the bill could run up to an approximated 4.8k. Decided to go with the police report so I officially (ugh fuck I seriously hate this word) got my first official (heehee) accident.

Thankfully the guy was really nice about the whole thing.***

Sorted everything out, got home had lunch freshened up and went out on my way to Urbanscapes with @amcheong.

Fuck me the moment I drove 1.5km the front tyre punctured and fuck lahhh damn dulan this sucks. What made things worse is that the tyre's almost brand new.

Got the puncture repaired for 6 bucks and went on to the worse shitty arts festival ever.

Simply put this way. Indie music will remain indie music for a very obvious reason. Its not music, its noise! And it gave me a very bad headache. My time could have been better spent listening to a garbage truck compacting the trash at least I can see the rubbish water coming out.

I am very very cranky now.

like really, get off my back everyone.

p/s: There were some really good photos so Urbanscapes redeemed itself yay. The photographers were unlike the typical Malaysian photographers so goody.

Garmin Nuvi 205

Oooo guess what the GPS caught yesterday.



Was driving home in the German Tank

Cold and Sorethroat

So I actually have a cold and sore throat at the moment. While I'm not all panicky, the risk of having caught the Selesema Babi is still pretty high and its being locked up in my room is not something I would really want to go through.

Being the idiot who makes a joke out of everything, I told my brother that by the time he's reading this (MSN convo) I would be dead and it is my wishes that my photographic equipment be liquidated and the monies invested in relevant securities.

The assets are then allowed to snowball into a sizeable sum, at that point it would be allowed to snowball even further to a scale where I can actually (posthumously) tie up entire economies.

"You have a fetish for macroeconomic-scale bondage! I tell mummy!"

"Tell lah!"

"Clearly that threat is not working"

"Actually it is but I am playing poker with you.

"I don't want to play poker with you. Its improper."

"wtf"***
I am actually shivering at the moment, its not good.

Another PDRM post lah.

Hello all,

Remember this?

Today's another post about them coppers. Was heading home after a visit to the girlfriend's when I passed a column of really slow cars. At that point a fucking an ah beng with HID lights tailgates me so I thought I'll be the nice guy and speed up a little and let the beng-guy overtake me.

Turns out I sped up right into a police camera. Fuck.

Well, this time I didn't want to be so rude because I got a summon in the mail for the previous round; but at the same time I wasn't so keen on getting another summon so I told the motherfucker that I didn't have much money (See I actually skipped the part about him asking me for money because YOU FUCKING CORRUPTED COPS ARE SO PREDICTABLE).

"Aiya, dua-dua pun susah. Saya sini ada seratus baki untuk bulan ini saja. You tolong saya, saya pun susah; you tulis saya pun susah."

"Saya tulis sekarang you ada masa satu minggu untuk bayar saman. Ini pun susah lebih baik you bagi I tolong you sekarang." (Fuck lah like I didn't know that blacklisting doesn't come so quickly with a speeding fine because I just paid for one yesterday)

Conversation bounces back and forth about me wanting to let him help me but unfortunately I couldn't because of the lack of financial liquidity. At that point he took his little book out and started making some scribblings on them, and continued preaching to me the virtues of him helping me. Guess he was trying a scare tactic where I would fall for it when he scratches his little notebook. One thing he didn't know was this: I was prepared to eat the fine rather than to pay his broke middle-of-the-month ass.

He later got bored of me and told me "Haiya jika takde duit bagi seringgit saje saya bagi you pergi."

I told him paying him one Ringgit wouldn't be good for his illegitimate business and would be insulting him at the same time.

He called me 'tak tahu malu' because he was trying to help me and I was being sarcastic.

I drove off in the end. I hope I won't get a letter in the box in a few month's time.

Three things I learnt today:-

1. You don't have to be nice to ah bengs, no matter how close they tiong your ass.
2. The corrupted ones are so predictable; the proper ones we don't see them because they're the ones out there catching the real criminals.
3. They waste their time on people driving a shade over the speed limit while criminals rape and rob, and robb other people. This is also so predictable.

Sian.

Hello Quick Quick wtf

This might sound really queer, but the sound of pneumatic wrenches rank very high on the list of sounds I like.

Little bastard operating the wrench, don't quite like him. Just because my rims are stock rims doesn't mean that you should throw them around carelessly.

Am very busy ATM so please repeatedly watch that video.

This is awesum stuff

So my tyres were really bald and I needed to get them changed, and the brother wisely came along and prodded me in the right way.

Tada!!

Woke up and left at 630 in the morning, guided by the great GPS, I got there a little past 845 (I like to drive slow)

Was one of the earlier ones into the track and was enjoying the clear track, building up the momentum. Found out from videos that my lap time's in the region of 59s.

Experienced my first off track moment as my tail started sliding. Counter-steered too aggressively and the car did a 180˚. Took Jeremy along with me when he tried to avoid me. Ate some grass along the way.

Sorry mate.


Video is NOT where I spun. I only did it once.

This is the result of my little jaunt. I suspect the tyre threads separated separated easily from the belt due to the age of the tyre. Tyres are something like DOTxx03



The insides represent my pre-track tyre conditions; while the outside, well go figure. A large proportion of the damage can be attributed to the very few times where I locked my tyres. In spite of my greater than usual braking skillz, I managed to lock it a few times; and I found it tremendously difficult to unlock them.


TK***
Drove home on my metal belts and got my tyres changed.

I have new tyres whee.

Carol Koh

Carol's one of the funnier Nuffies around. While her humour is not brash and crude like Pinky, she still pulls off something of her own class.

This is me, annoying the shit out of her while...I was shitting.

2 punnies!

Toiletries Shopping

Nicholas called me an aunty yesterday for what I discussing what I am about to write about.***

I was once sending someone home when I mentioned some fuel optimising strategies.

Take the below illustrated route for example, and my aim is to head from point A to B.


I described the advantages of taking route 1 over route 2

Route 1 has 3 braking/acceleration points, as opposed to Route 2 which has only 1 braking/acceleration point. This should save a fair bit of $$$ over time; and to top that off I have the right of way as I pass by the last junction before Point B.


Route 2



Downside is that I would need a stop at the traffic lights, but that is acceptable as the waiting time is negligible (only if you are familar with the location).

Said associate asked me why am I so calculative. Its not being calculative, its called stretching your dollar.***

My toothpaste and bar soap supplies were running low at home so I dropped by Cold Storage to resupply my stockpile.

In case some of you think I am being penny wise pound foolish by shopping at Cold Storage, I went there because I was in the area (travelling to Tesco = time + petrol; both of which are money)

Here are some general rules of purchasing most goods.

1. Big is cheap

1 tube of Darlie toothpaste, 250g costs me RM8.59, while a smaller one at 175g costs me RM6.59 (est).

Cost per volume is lower with larger packages.

2. Check for freebies


Purchased a packet of Dettol soap (found out that its abit too drying FML) in a 'Buy 3 Free 1' shrink wrap.

That's 25% off per bar; or a 33% gain. These items are very often displayed side by side with similar products with no attached freebies. Either item could be expired promotions, but are still available for sale as it is more cost effective to liquidate them rather than to repackage.

3. There are exceptions to rule #1.
Sometimes its good to take your calculator out.



1 bottle of Sunsilk 375ml costs RM12.99 (or RM12.69, I forgot), while a 700ml bottle costs RM26.99; bringing their cost per volume to RM34.64/litre RM38.55/litre respectively.



The upside was that the larger bottle had a pump, but pumps are a waste because we tend to squish too much out anyway. YOU ARE PAYING FOR THE FUCKING PUMP!

I went back to the office feeling better that I saved a few ringgit, especially with the shampoo.

For brainless stingeing, Carrefour often displays the cost per volume/weight information on their rack labels.

4. Recycle
Not exactly related to shopping but a habit that we all should have.

I tend to wear my soap down to really thin slices before getting a new one, and I usually stick it onto the newer bar.



If you don't stick it on you'll probably throw it away anyway right?***

Now on to something that is REALLY stingy but serves no achievements.

This is how I usually fill up my petrol. I'll wait till the tank is really really empty before I fill it up. I'll pass my RM70.00 and my Bonuslink, and tell the nice lady (or the ugly guy) at the counter and say "Pam tigabelas (or whatever), penuh thankyou"

I'll bear in mind the rounding adjectives and fill my car with that extra 2 cents (i.e. RM63.02, today's fill) to stinge on that bloody 2 cents.

Really serves no purpose but I do it just for my own satisfaction.

Rounding figures rock!

Coming soon: ah beng fuel saving techniques.

Blogging Nicholas Chay-style

Office toilet.


The shitty part is that this night owl's schedule is not consistent T_T

Else I'll be working nights and calling clients at 3am.

Monsters vs. Aliens in 3D tonight. Sucks if you don't have a ticket.

Time to try to sleep fuck.